Thursday, 5 February 2015

A Lunchtime Encounter with Ignorance: Fight, Flight or … Teaching opportunity?

When I join the company, I sit down simply as a new colleague, looking forward to fellowship with others. We are planning an event that aims at breaking down walls of division and bringing people together, regardless of our theological differences.

However, I am quickly made aware of the fact that I am the only African - sitting down for a meal with 10 other people (all British).

He sits next to me - very opinionated and clearly the conversation maker. I don't know how - but suddenly the conversation is about the group of Africans that have a meal at his church once a month. He explains that they clearly have no table manners - they "pick up the food with their hands and stuff their mouths". He then says: "They've invited me often to eat with them, but I conveniently think up an excuse, because I really don't want to eat with them".

Sometimes I wish it was more obvious that I was black. Maybe then, people wouldn't be so blatantly honest about their prejudices.

He then turns to me and says: "How did you deal with that when you were in Africa?" Everyone looks at me. I can sense the nervousness. I say to him (sarcastically): "I am an African. And that is how I eat too?" "Oh," he says, "but you're not eating like that now." I can feel the anger rising up in me. And I calmly respond: "I am sitting at a British table!"

Someone then raises a completely different topic and the conversation continues. From that point I feel like someone sitting outside of the fellowship - observing a conversation that I am not part of.


The group meets at the homes of different members on a rota basis - and has a meal together.  Do I take my turn and put "stywe pap" and red meat on the table (without forks and knives)? Alternatively - do I just stay away? I am so tired of fighting this type of battle.

No comments:

Post a Comment